It was pointed out to me that my new title could be interpreted in 2 different ways.

They both work.

....sometimes I'm to Funkaaaay for myself!

I am a Canadian. I was born and raised in this country. I went to a Canadian University (2 in fact). I have 2 university degrees. I speak one of the national languages very very well.

So it boggles my mind why:

• My teaching credentials need to be 'evaluated' before I can work in another province -- I sincerely doubt that after subbing/ doing temp. assignments for 3 years in two BC school districts that I will find Ontario schools completely different. So it burns me that I had to pay $350 to be evaluated and that I have to wait 6 weeks while being evaluated to find out that there is really no difference between my BC teaching certificate and the Ontario one I hope to receive.
• Getting a teaching position in a major Canadian city is hard enough without having to jump through these useless and expensive hoops. Certification just means I am qualified -- isn't that what my degree says? I can appreciate that there are some benefits to belonging to a professional organization -- but the evaluation fee is different if you completed your education in Ontario than if you completed your education elsewhere in Canada. Why??? Will there be some differences? Probably. Fundamental differences?? -- in the case of education I doubt it. It's not like this more expensive evaluation prepares me for working in Ontario. It won't enlighten me on curriculum differences or anything potentially useful.

• That getting a new drivers license would take longer than 5 minutes. I have held a drivers license since I was 16 -- that means I have been driving in this country in excess of 10 years. I have held licences in Saskatchewan and BC and never had trouble switching between the two -- what is wrong with Ontario???

• That changing my insurance and vehicle registration would be such a royal pain in the ass (though this was also a pain when moving from SK to BC).

• That my brand new 2006 vehicle that was purchased in CANADA has to go through an exaust and safety examination. It has been driven for exactly 1 month. Yes, it has km's on it -- we drove here from BC.
• Can you say: COMPLETE SCAM

It just seems silly that things that should be simple are made so complicated -- afterall, people move.

Ok, I'm stealing the title from Sam's Known and Unknown format - but it is oh so fitting.

Before I even start let me say that I know my brother will probably comment that I am being a baby and I already know that I am one. I live in a family filled with babies. So it cannot be helped.

My parents and brothers leave tomorrow to come visit in Ontario. How long they will stay is anyone's guess. First, they were to stay until August 9th -- but that's the day I move into my new apartment, so I said, "why don't you leave on the 12th -- that way you can actually see my place, help us out AND be here for my 30th birthday." My mom gives the standard hmm and haw, but acknowledges that she has holidays until August 21st. In my mind, I was sure that meant: Done Deal.

Well in talking to my sister last night -- she claims it is impossible for them to stay until my birthday because they have to be back to watch her son on the 14th. I was like -- well they'll be back Tuesday, find a sitter. Well that's just impossible (why?) and "Krista what are you three -- why do you need mommy and daddy to be there for your birthday anyway?" I again, had to bite my tongue at the many retorts that came to mind and still do. I could get into the details of why she is just as big a baby as me, but what's the point.

Maybe turning thirty will require quiet contemplation. Yes, I should be glad they won't be here.

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When I post this they will all shit their pants thinking it is an attack on them but it isn't -- it is free therapy for me.

Since arriving here in Toronto, we have been bombarded with terrible service and strange, freaky people.

Yesterday Neil went into a KFC. So, okay, this is not the pinnacle of sophistication. That said, you'd think you would be able to order some fried chicken and go on your merry old way. This is what happened:

Minute 1
Neil enters KFC, 2-3 customers in front of him.
Minute 1.15 - 10
Man at the front of the line:
"How big is the small salad?" Clerk goes to the back to grab the container.
"How big is the medium salad?" Clerk goes to the back to grab the container.
"How big is the large salad?" Clerk goes to the back to grab the container.
"How big is the Twister Sandwich?" Clerk goes to the back, brings back the cook, they describe the size.
"How big is the popcorn chicken?" Clerk goes to the back to grab the container.
"How big are buckets of chicken?" Clerk goes to the back to grab the container.
"How big is my brain?" Clerk says, "tiny just like your penis." (Okay -- I added this one)

Then he starts yelling at the clerk to speak English. Neil says that it was obvious to all that English was the clerk's first language.

We don't know how this ended because Neil left at this point. He'd seen enough. Personally, I'd have pulled up a chair - you can't make this shit up!

Just as I post that last blog, I receive a text message from Neil. It says, "Neil is a dumbass. Outside reading at Starbucks. Getting rained on."

Well rain on, bad luck. We'll come out on top some day! (I hope)